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Anna Nicole Smith from 36A to 42DD

Anna Nicole Smith from 36A to 42DD

Finally a story with legs. Finally a story to take our minds off of the fact that on Monday the Soviet Union threatened to blast the new American missiles in Poland and the Czech Republic to smitherines. Finally a story to whisk us away for a few short moments from the abject repressed terror of our global warming catastrophe and nuclear world war 3 real live Hell on earth inferno future. Like Anna Nicole Smith we are all about to go out with a bang. 2, 000 years ago the Messiah Howard K. Stern, a Jewish legal expert had to make a choice. "Should I go into Jerusalem to the Temple of my father and tell the people that I was hereby abolishing their Holy Bibles because they were written by bloggers and signed "God", (Ezekiel 13:6) or should I stay in Galillee, do a little fishing, play a little golf, hang out with my family and friends, including Mary Magdalene and her girlfriends?" Did Mary Magdalene know that death would transform her first into a hooker and then into a saint? Remember, these were the days before cloning and plastic surgery. "Those were the days my friend, we thought they'd never end, we'd sing and dance forever and a day, We'd live the life we choose, We'd fight and never lose, Those were the days, Oh yes those were the days." In the good old days Anna Nicole Smith was 5'11", a gorgeous yet flat chested blonde dancing on a pole, a modern day pole vaulter. Also excellent at the shot put there was a time that she considered a career as an Olympic Decathlete. Helen Mirren is polishing up her Oscar acceptance speech for her portrayal of Freddy Mercury, on the heels of Phillip Seymour Hoffman scooping the gold statue for his portrayal of Truman Capote. Biographies being all the rage with the the academy of motion picture arts and sciences Hollywood's A list actresses are now sleeping with everyone in sight in order to play the lead role in the "Anna Nicole Smith Story". These are actresses who in real life refused to take a call from Anna Nicole Smith who has been transformed by death into a legend on par with Eve in the Garden of Eden. In real life Anna Nicole Smith longed to be the friend of Britney Spears, another victim of silicone valley. While 22 year old stunning 36A Vicky Lynn Hogan was slithering around a pole for a few bucks and carrying on a 3 year relationship with the true love of her life, a bulldog faced 30 year old woman by the name of Sandi Powledge, she was smart, outgoing, vivacious with a terrific sense of humor said her profile on match dot. Along came J. Howard Marshall, a 90 year old dirty old man who spent his days not in the retirement home where he belonged but in "Pervert Haven", a Houston strip club. Anna agreed to dance for the old fart in exchange for a pair of breasts and then agreed to marry him in exchange for $500 million dollars. J. Howard Marshall said to his real life fantasy doll, "If this will get Judge Seidlin his own T.V. show then why not? I'll still have a billion dollars left over and I only have a few weeks to live anyway", according to sworn court depositions. Jesus Christ or someone famous said "The truth shall set you free." In "And Justice for All" Al Pacino said "The only justice in the halls of justice is in the halls" meaning that there is no justice to be found in the courtrooms. It is a wonder that when witnesses put their hands on the Holy Bible and swear to God to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth the Bibles don't fly out of the hands of the court clerk and burst into flames. Yesterday the Vice President of the United States Dick Cheney told an audience in Australia that the scientists are arguing over whether or not human beings are contributing to global warming. This is what you get when you allow oil executives to run the country. Asked for ament on this statement the President of the United States answered, "I love Dick." In a recent bitter email exchange with Larry Birkhead, Anna Nicole Smith said "Y'all are sick." Anna Nicole Smith knew from experience that men reacted quite differently and her position in life became quite different when her surgeon inserted the official basketballs of the NBA into her chest. Immediately Anna went from geriatric pervert nurse to Playboy Playmate of the Year. In 2005 Spalding came out with their new NEVERFLAT technology which is the use of leak proof nitroflate molecules to ensure a perfect bounce for one year. The philosophical question facing America today is "Was Howard K. Stern using Anna Nicole Smith or was Anna Nicole Smith using Howard K. Stern?" Jewish people today are not held in high regard by the 1.3 billion person Muslim World. In 1939 50 million Christian Germans escorted 6 million Jews, blacks and homosexuals to the showers. Since that time the image of the Jewish people, referred to in the New Testament as "Christ Killers" and "The Synagogue of Satan" has been rehabilitated in the 2 billion person Christian world. In three days of hearings the sharp nosed Howard K. Stern and the court jester Larry Seidlin have set back Christian Jewish relations to the point where Vice President Dick Cheney has now invited Mahmoud Ahmidinejad to the first annual Holocaust Denial Conference to be held in Houston Texas July 4 through July 8, 2007. As they say, "Every cloud has a silver lining." By joining Daniel in Heaven Anna Nicole Smith has single handedly healed Christian Muslim relations. Britney Spears is now about to join Anna Nicole Smith in Heaven to co-star in "The Implants that Ate Chicago". Lets watch the stinking vultures from Hell fight over her fortune and babies.
Karen Fish is a writer currently living in Los Angeles California. The Temple of Love thetempleoflove thetempleoflove

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